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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26936932">I Hate You, Don't Leave Me</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Project324b21/pseuds/Project324b21'>Project324b21</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Jessica Jones (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Dorothy was a bad mom, F/F, First Kiss, First Time, Friendship/Love, Other Additional Tags to Be Added</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-08 19:27:07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Underage</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,408</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26936932</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Project324b21/pseuds/Project324b21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Jessica and Trish have had a tumultuous relationship through the years, to say the least. However, they always seem to come back together no matter how many times they fall apart.</p>
<p>or</p>
<p>Five intimate moments between Jessica and Trish. Will either of them confess their love?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jessica Jones/Patricia Walker</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>34</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>I Hate You, Don't Leave Me</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It’s been a little over a year since Jessica lost her family and got adopted by Dorothy Walker as a PR stunt for her daughter Patsy. That’s the name Jessica knew her as when she used to skim the tv channels with her brother after school. The cheery “It’s Patsy!” theme always made Jessica roll her eyes. She was decidedly not a fan of the show. In those days she always assumed pretty little Patsy had the perfect life. From the outside it looked like she had it all. Looks can be so deceiving.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jessica now knows that the child star prefers to be called Trish. Jessica can’t blame her there; Patsy is so cringe worthy. She also now knows that Trish’s life is far from perfect. It’s been seven months since Jessica stopped Dorothy from forcing Trish’s own fingers down her throat, exposing her powers in the process. Trish didn’t want Jessica to save her, but Jessica couldn’t stand by and let that monster get away with her abuse anymore. Her and Trish started growing closer since that day, the both of them realizing that they needed each other to survive the Walker household.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jessica and Trish are lazing around on the blonde’s bed as they usually do when Dorothy decides to drink herself into a coma, Trish is propped against her pillows with a Cosmopolitan magazine spread across her lap that she stole from her mom’s room earlier in the day. Jessica is laying with her head at the foot of the bed, a small CD player resting on her stomach, and a pair of headphones resting on her head. She’s listening to one of the few rock albums Dorothy has allowed her to have and she cherishes the sound of Kurt Cobain’s vocals soothing her soul. Her bare toes tap against Trish’s bedspread, some thick purple fabric with a pink and white floral pattern all over it. It’s just as girly as Trish is and Jessica’s glad to have her plain red and black comforter on her bed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Trish’s room is about three times the size of Jessica’s. The walls are decorated with pictures, posters, and awards for various tv appearances. Jessica’s room is tiny and bare, with only one poster and one picture adorning the white wall. The stark difference is another way for Dorothy to let her know her place. She isn’t actually family. That’s okay with Jessica, she already had a family. The dark-haired teenager is pulled from her thoughts when Trish taps on her leg.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah?” Jessica questions as she pulls her headphones to rest around her neck.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Come look at this article.” Trish giggles excitedly and pats the spot next to her. The orphaned teen rolls her eyes as she sits her CD player down and clambers up beside the blonde.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I don’t know why you want to look at these ridiculous magazines.” Jessica comments with a scoff. “It’s all fashion advice and weight loss tips.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Just hush and look.” Trish practically shoves the magazine in her face, making her sputter. She snatches the paper from the girl’s hands and studies the page Trish is so interested in. The headline on the page reads <em>10 Tips To A Better Orgasm</em>. Jessica feels her cheeks heat up as she scans through the rest of the page.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Why are you showing me this?” The blushing girl practically throws the offending magazine back at Trish.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Did you know that girls have different types of orgasms?” Trish inquires as she points to a specific spot on the page. “It says that girls can ejaculate just like guys. They call it squirting.” Jessica scrunches up her face at the information.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Why do they call it that? It sounds so weird.” Jessica isn’t the type to search for information on this type of stuff, losing your entire family in a tragic car accident really takes your mind off of sex and romance, so all the details Jessica knows have come from Trish.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah but it’s supposed to feel really good.” Trish shrugs. “Better than a normal orgasm.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Okay.” Jessica murmurs, unsure of what else to say. Trish knows a lot about sex. Jessica thinks that’s mainly due to the blonde’s mother pimping her out but Trish claims that she just likes it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“The first time I ever came, I was in the shower and when it hit my legs got so shaky I almost fell and I left a mark on my arm from biting it to stay quiet.” Trish continues babbling, oblivious to Jessica’s uncomfortable shifting. “What was your first one like?” Trish asks, curious as ever.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jessica freezes with her mouth partially open in panic. It’s not unusual for Trish to talk about sex but she’s never asked Jessica any questions like this. Jessica swallows down her growing embarrassment to finally answer the child star.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Um…don’t laugh but, I haven’t had one.” Jessica is practically whispering by the end of the sentence. She’s not sure why she is so embarrassed about this fact. She only turned sixteen a few weeks ago, she’s not supposed to have a lot of experience.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What?” To her credit, Trish doesn’t laugh. She just looks shocked and slightly interested. “I know you haven’t had sex, but not even when you masturbate?” Jessica is pretty sure her cheeks are glowing at this point. Why is Trish asking her all this?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I don’t really do that much.” Jessica shrugs. It’s the truth, and even when she does find her hand sneaking down the front of her pants, she stops before she gets to that point.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh.” Trish frowns. “Why? There’s nothing wrong with it.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I-I know that.” Jessica stutters feeling very put on the spot. “It just hasn’t been on my mind.” She can feel blue eyes studying her closely.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Can I ask another question?” A cold hand grabs hers from her lap.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You just did.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“How many people have you kissed?” Trish completely ignores her sarcasm. Jessica pulls her hand from Trish’s and busies herself with picking at a lose thread on the bedspread, ignoring the blonde’s hurt look at the loss of contact.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Why are you asking me all this?” Jessica has never participated in girl-talk before meeting Trish. Jessica has always been a loner and despised the preppy girls that always talked about boys and clothes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m just curious.” If Jessica were looking, she’d have seen the way Trish’s eyes scanned her as her tongue peeked out to wet dry lips. “Friends tell each other this stuff.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Fine.” Jessica turns her back to the blonde, so she won’t see the look on her face when she hears Jessica’s pathetic secret. “The answer is zero.” The dark-haired girl stares at the ground with blushing cheeks as she answers. No one has ever shown interest in kissing Jessica before and so far, that’s been fine with her. Jessica has only ever had the desire to kiss one person after all. “Teenage boys are dumb.” Jessica shrugs. She feels Trish shift behind her before thin arms wrap around her stiff frame.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You don’t have to be embarrassed.” Hot breath ghosts over her face as the blonde murmurs in her ear. Jessica shivers as hands come up to move her long black hair to the side and Trish rests her chin on Jess’s boney shoulder. “I’ve never actually kissed anyone I wanted to kiss.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jessica wants to start throwing things at that comment. Trish says it so casually, like there isn’t any problem with the fact that she’s only ever slept with grown men to get roles, like her mother isn’t a complete monster that uses her, like the men who touched her weren’t committing a crime. Jessica wishes she could rip the hands and dicks off of every pervert who ever looked at Trish wrong, who treated her as anything less than the angel Jessica sees her as.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Not even any of the teen heart throb’s that guest starred on your show that you kissed on screen?” Jessica drawls sarcastically. She fights to ignore the heat of the other girl’s body pressing into her back, but it is distracting as hell.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ugh, those scenes are so awkward and most of those guys are assholes off camera.” Trish scrunches up her face in disgust as she scoffs. Her breath blows across Jessica’s neck causing goosebumps to pop up. Jessica hopes the blonde doesn’t notice.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“They’re assholes on camera too.” Jessica quips, smiling at the laugh that bursts from the blonde. They fall into silence for a few moments as Trish fidgets with the corner of the magazine. “Have you ever wanted to?” Trish’s voice drops lower than usual as she asks, and her arms tighten around Jessica.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“T-to what?” She can’t be asking what it sounds like. Jessica must finally be losing her mind. Maybe this is all in her head…Trish, her powers. Maybe she’s still in a coma and this is all a weird dream. Any of that would make more sense than what she thinks Trish is proposing.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Kiss someone.” Trish lands a small peck on Jessica’s covered shoulder. “Kiss me?” The child star sounds slightly nervous now. As if she is nervous about the response she’s going to get.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You want to kiss me?” Her voice comes out huskier than Jessica has ever heard it. She just can’t understand why Trish of all people would want this, want her. The celebrity could have any boy or girl she wanted. Jessica has seen how people throw themselves at the teenager when they are out. It can actually be quite disturbing to see how obsessed people, adults, and children alike, can get with a teenager on a tv screen.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah, if you want to. Friends practice kissing on each other sometimes. Then you’ll be ready when it’s time to kiss a guy.” Trish explains. Jessica feels her heart sink slightly and is glad Trish can’t see her facial expression, then she’d see the downtrodden look that takes over. Right. This is all friendly. Of course, Trish would never want a freak like her. Trish is just being a good friend.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Um, okay.” Jessica agrees before she even realizes the words are coming from her mouth. This is not a good idea at all, but at the same time she wants it so bad. Jess can’t think of a more perfect person to share her first kiss with. No one has ever made her feel like Trish does.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jessica feels cold as Trish pulls detaches herself from Jess’s body to shift back against the headboard. Her teeth scrape against her bottom lip as she glances nervously at the blonde, unsure how to proceed now. Why did she agree to this? What if she is a horrible kisser and makes a complete fool of herself? She doesn’t think she could deal with Trish laughing at her failure.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Come on, Jess.” Trish pats the spot in front of her. Jessica crawls to mirror her position leaving them both sitting crisscross applesauce across from each other. Blue eyes connect with her hazel ones as a thin hand slips into her bigger one. Trish leans in closer until Jess can feel hot puffs of breath against her lips. “Is this okay?” Trish whispers delicately, as if she’s afraid speaking too loud will shatter this moment. Jessica gives a small nod as an answer, too nervous to come up with actual words.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The first kiss is a simple peck, a brief touching of closed lips. Trish’s lips are as soft as silk and for a second Jess feels bad about how chapped her own lips are. Her heart picks up pace, racing along to the beat of her growing desire. Jess keeps her eyes shut for a second after Trish pulls away. She wants to freeze time and stay in that moment. The first thing her vision settles on when her eyes flutter open is Trish’s pink bottom lip trapped between pearly white teeth. Jessica isn’t conscious of her hand reaching up to cup Trish’s face, her thumb releasing the plump lip from its confinement. The child star’s breath shutters slightly and suddenly she’s lurching forward for a second kiss.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jess is surprised by the eagerness Trish shows in this follow up kiss. The kiss is firm, Jess’s bottom lip caught pleasantly between both Trish’s lips. The blonde hums lowly and the vibration against her lips causes Jessica to gasp into the kiss. The next thing she feels is a hot tongue lightly running across her lip and she exhales harshly through her nose. Jessica tilts her head slightly and allows Trish to sneak her tongue in to connect with her own. The new sensation makes her feel lightheaded. Trish tastes minty, like the tooth paste she used after dinner.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Hands snake around Jessica’s waist and suddenly Trish is straightening her legs and pulling the super powered girl to straddle them. Jessica allows Trish to move her but is careful to keep her weight on her knees instead of on Trish. Jessica’s own hands rest on Trish’s shoulders, unsure of what to really do with them. The kiss never breaks through their position change. It feels like it goes on forever until she feels Trish pull back for air, then it doesn’t feel long enough. They are both breathing heavily as they stare at each other.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Wow.” Trish pants out, moving her hands to rub Jess’s thighs.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah.” Jessica agrees dizzily. She doubts this is what most first kisses feel like and she feels jealous of the unworthy people who have gotten to feel the press of Trish’s lips before her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“That was way better than my other kisses.” Trish giggles cutely, a lovely flush on her cheeks. Jess nods dumbly, not really sure what she’s even nodding at. Trish just grins at her blown pupils and leans in to place a short kiss on Jess’s lips. This time as soon as she pulls back, she moves to connect her lips to the black-haired girl’s jawline. Jessica’s hands tighten slightly on narrow shoulders in response, Trish pauses. “Is this okay?” Concerned blue eyes peer at her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah.” She husks, her voice barely sounding. She clears her throat before speaking again. “You just caught me off guard is all.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Just checking.” Trish nods in understanding as she places an open-mouthed kiss on Jessica’s neck. She moves up and down Jessica’s neck leaving kisses with hints of tongue and suction. The heat in between Jessica’s legs burns hotter. Jessica has the sudden desire to be marked, not that it would last more than a couple hours. This is the only time that her healing ability is a bother. Just as she is having these thoughts, she feels teeth clamp down firmly on her skin. A sharp gasp leaves her lips as her hips buck down involuntarily. She ends up accidentally grinding against Trish’s lap and the friction is delicious. She hears a tiny little moan, shortly realizing that it came from her. She feels a blush creep from her chest to cover her face.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Sorry.” Jessica apologizes, embarrassed by the unintentional noise. She buries her face in the crook of the blonde’s neck, hiding. Trish simply shushes her before bending her knee, raising her leg to rub against the crotch of Jessica’s jeans. Jessica gasps and pulls back to look questioningly at her best friend. “Trish?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It’s okay.” Trish assure her as her fingers curl around Jessica’s slender hips, pulling to encourage her into movement as she reconnects their lips. Jess takes direction from the blonde, letting the girl control the roll of her hips as Trish tenses her thigh at every pass. The seam of Jessica’s jeans seem to rub her in the perfect spot and it isn’t long before more tiny sounds are leaving her throat against her will. There’s this tingly feeling pooling in the pit of her stomach that she’s never experienced before. She tangles one hand in blonde hair while the other braces itself on the wall beside Trish’s head as her hips pick up speed slightly. Everything is building and building, and suddenly she freezes, stilling her hips completely and squeezing her eyes shut tightly. Her body screams at her in protest, demanding that she chase this unknown high.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Jess?” Trish’s voice is laced with desire and worry at the same time as she stares up at Jess with big blue eyes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I just-“ Jessica takes a deep shuttering breath. “It’s a lot.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It feels good?” Trish checks, receiving a nod from the raven-haired girl. “Don’t be afraid of it. You’ll feel even better.” Jessica pants as Trish rests her forehead against hers, hands urging her to continue her movements. “I’ve got you.” Trish murmurs before going back down to mouth at Jessica’s neck more. Jessica gives into her body’s pleading and starts the slow roll of her hips back up. Her body shivers against Trish as the blonde sucks a bit of Jessica’s skin into her mouth.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The embarrassing noises start up again, though it seems she’s the only one bothered by them. Trish hums against the skin of her neck in response to every noise, seemingly loving hearing the evidence of Jessica’s pleasure. Jessica is glad that this house is big, and Dorothy could sleep through a hurricane when she’s drunk. Otherwise Jess is sure that she would know exactly what is happening in her daughters’ room.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jessica feels that heat building again as her hips start to lose their rhythm slightly, thrusting erratically against Trish’s thigh. A hand leave’s her hips to snake up under her sleep shirt and cup her small breast. She hadn’t bothered to wear a bra under her pajama’s and feeling Trish’s thumb rub over her hardened nipple before lightly pinching it is enough to set Jessica off. Her whole body seizes up against the blonde, her toes curling, and her back arching sharply.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“There you go.” Trish encourages with a raspy voice as a series of short gasping cries leave Jess’s mouth as her body convulses, writhing against Trish. She drops her head down onto Trish’s shoulder as she catches her breath. Trish wraps her arms around Jessica’s frame, holding her as she comes down from her high. Jessica isn’t really sure what to do now in this awkward moment. Part of her wants to flee the room before Trish can say anything else and part wants to stay in the girls arms forever. The awkward silence they stay in is the only reason Jessica hears footsteps on the floor below coming towards the stairs. She jerks up at looks over at Trish’s alarm clock. The big red numbers scream the time at her, 12:48am.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Shit! Your mom is on her way upstairs. You have to be on set early in the morning. You were supposed to be in bed two hours ago.” Jessica hisses panicked as she jumps up and grabs her CD player and headphones from the floor. Trish turns to grab the discarded magazine and throw it into her nightstand as Jess rushes toward the door.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hang out again tomorrow?” Trish sounds hopeful. Jessica isn’t really sure what to make of the night, but she doesn’t have time to process right now. Plus, she could never deny Trish anything.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Of course.” Jess offers her a strained smile before opening the door and rushing to her room just as Dorothy was halfway up the stairs. She gets to her room just in time to avoid being seen and flops down heavily on the bed. Her body is still humming from its earlier experience. Jessica can’t figure out if the encounter was a mistake or the best thing to happen to her, or both. It’s probably both. She has already learned that she doesn’t receive good things without something bad coming with it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The next day comes, and to Jessica’s surprise everything is back to normal between them. Neither Trish nor she bring up what happened between them. Sometimes though, Jessica catches Trish looking at her in this way that makes her think she’s remembering it. Like maybe thoughts of Jessica invade Trish’s mind all day long too. It hurts Jessica slightly that Trish never mentions it, but maybe it’s for the best anyway. Jessica would do nothing but hurt her in the end. She couldn’t take that chance, so she’d shove her feelings down, be the best friend Trish needs.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Main title and chapter titles are taken from Queen Demi Lovato's song I Hate You, Don't Leave Me.</p>
<p>The first chapter is the only chapter where they are 16. I tried not to get very graphic with it.</p>
<p>Please give comments and kudos if you want more!</p>
<p>PS: I really miss Jessica Jones. RIP.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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